The Beatles: Barely mediocre
As the first rays of morning sun filtered through the Venetian blinds covering the windows to the French doors of my residence for the next few weeks, I smiled, turned off my alarm on the Blackberry set to play Peter Gabriel’s “Sledgehammer,” and proceeded to engage in my usual morning routine.
Turn on the laptop, press ‘play’ on iTunes, check e-mail, Facebook, and Twitter. While perusing Facebook, though, I found out that one of my favorite musical artists, Steve Winwood, is releasing a greatest hits collection.
That was the catalyst which prompted me to start thinking, once again, about just how mediocre (at best) The Beatles were/are!
Yes, I know, it’s an unpopular stance to not worship, idolize, and/or adore the (not all that) ‘Fantastic Four’ from Liverpool, but on an awesomeness scale of bug zapper to Krakatoa, they barely register as a firecracker.
“But, but…the Beatles wrote SO many songs,” you say. Since when did being prolific equate to being great or exemplary? The New York Yankees have acquired a few dozen World Series championships, does that mean they’re awesome and all should love them? Certainly not (go Braves)!
Emily Dickinson wrote over 1,500 poems, is that cause to jump in jubilation at the seemingly infinite number of ways one can spiral into a melancholic state?!
“But, the Beatles influenced so many artists!” you say. Oh, you mean like the Jonas Brothers? Justin Bieber? All emo kids who think because they know three chords on guitar they can whine about how sucky life is? I’ll say it’s that the Beatles influenced other artists on what drugs NOT to take in order to compose a song somewhere in the realm of sanity (I don’t care if you’re the egg man or the walrus, you’re not getting my money).
Why such little love for The Beatles?
Now, don’t get me wrong, after the break-up, three-fourths of The Beatles went on to create quite stellar resumes (the holdout being history’s worst drummer Ringo Starr). Just consider other pop/rock bands that were formed in the 1960s: The Cascades, The Animals, The Dave Clark Five, The Association, The Four Seasons, The Hollies. Take a minute.
Google them if you must.
If you wouldn’t rather take Eric Burdon’s soul-infused vocals, or Graham Nash’s outstanding songwriting and guitar playing, or anyone else, living or undead, on drums, then ask yourself why in the world you listen to a group that’s okay when a group that is truly awesome is waiting to be heard. They probably want to hold your hand, too. And more than likely, their hands won’t be sweaty.
