Have we become robots?

Today, the lady at the bank told me to “Come again!” in a ridiculously cheery voice, as if her persistence was what kept me coming back every day to bring the deposit for my place of employment.

Actually, the bank tellers at BancorpSouth and I go way back. When I was a little kid, my dad would send me across the street with a deposit bag to take to the counter; now that I’m all grown up, the same exact thing happens, except I’m getting paid and Dad is now referred to as Boss.

And for all of these years that I have been doing this, there have always been the same two bank tellers. They know me; I know them. It’s an awkward relationship, but it works.

So, why am I urged every day to “Come again!”?

It’s a premeditated goodbye that this teller gives everyone.

With each passing day, I’m tempted to look at this sweet lady in the eyes and shout “No! I’m taking my business to Trustmark. Hasta la vista, baby!”

But today, my bank experience really had me thinking: we all do it. We all decide beforehand what we are going to say before we say it. When I’m at work, I answer the phone “The ReView, this is Emily,” when I’m at home “Hello!,” and when I feel like screwing with my mom’s mind, “Pizza Hut, Courtney speaking.”

Phone calls aside, I’m sure you’ve all slipped before while speaking. You’ve said “You too!” to the cashier who says “Come back to see us,” or you’ve said some strange “half-word” when you were going to say something but switched mid-word.

My favorite example is in “Mean Girls.” Half of you already know what I’m talking about.

Lindsay Lohan’s character says “grool” when she gets “great” and “cool” mixed up. I think “grool” is a great word. It’s something original. It’s unique. I’ve recently been getting sick of canned greetings and expressions.

In all honesty, I’ve known this lady since I was six. Can she come up with something a little more personal than “Come again!”? Or maybe just something that makes sense, such as “Bye!”

It’s as if we’ve become so infatuated with efficiency and progression that people are turning themselves into robots.

If it’s easy and convenient that must be the only way to go.

I think that is why I am so against gift cards. I absolutely hate giving them unless someone specifically asks for one and even then, it hurts my soul. I feel like I could have come up with a more heartfelt gift. I could have given them a present that meant something.

And before you start calling me a hypocrite, I do not particularly enjoy receiving them either.

I’d rather have a homemade photo collage than a $25 gift card to Blockbuster any day, because I know that you cared enough to look through pictures, print them out, cut them out and glue them together.

Or maybe you are just cheap.

Either way, I like the idea of being from the heart, which is why I’m sick of getting the same greetings and the same goodbyes as everyone else. We all do it. It’s unavoidable, but perhaps if we start changing up some of our hard-wired premeditated actions, such as how we answer a phone, then we can start doing more sincere and unfeigned gestures.

That’s why tomorrow if I start feeling frisky, I just might answer the phone “Le Journal de Comte de Jones, Je m’appelle Emily.”